I met him on Facebook, he was a Facebook friend that I had never met in person, he messaged me out the blue because he noticed I was going through hard times with my sister being in surgery so he offered kind words and money to help out with my situation. From that day I was very intrigued… I thought to myself no one has every done that for me before so whatever it was that we had, it must be real and from then on I fell in love with the idea of love, the idea of a family and the idea of a relationship…In the beginning our relationship was mysterious and lustful, when I look back at things I was very shy around him, always trying to appear perfect for him. So many red flags and signs appeared throughout the relationship that when I look back at it, it’s obvious he wasn’t the one. He was very secretive he often told me that, to keep my friends and family in my business all the time would cause problems in our relationship and I listened, he had had a dark side to him that at the time I knew it was off but I said to myself I can’t judge him.. I have my own sins… I never met any of his family because he always told me he didn’t have a good relationship with them, he always played the victim and talked about how everybody tried to use him for money. He didn’t have a relationship with his mother, he didn’t believe in GOD or believe in a higher power, so many things shouted wrong guy but I ignored them all because the vision in my head was for my night in shining armor to come into my life and swoop me away, take care of me and to make me a better women. At that time in my life I had been dancing for the past 8 years and still was, I was 28, turning 29 and all I wanted was a normal life, I wanted someone to love me, I wanted a family of my own, I wanted kids one day soon.. I wanted marriage.. I wanted all of those fairytale things, and when we talked about all of these things he said he wanted them as well. We talked about how many kids we wanted, we talked about what type of wedding we wanted.. One statement I remember him saying all the time was “my next relationship will be my last relationship” in my head I wanted that to mean that he was the one.. our relationship was off and on for about a year.. it seemed like a really long time but I barely knew him and he barely knew me. To make a very long story short he talked me into giving him 15k, he told me that he would invest it and I would get a return of 5k a month back for the next few years… He explained to me that this was a way to restart my life because he knew I wanted to stop dancing, It sounds crazy now but then it was all so believable, I trusted him, I believed in him, I loved him.. long story short about a couple days after I gave him all 15 thousand of my dollars that I worked my butt off for, the day of my birthday, he started a argument with me over nothing.. where he literally stopped talking to me for almost 2 weeks.. when I asked for my money back, his response was “what money”?
At that moment I knew he had just played me, I was sad, I was angry, I was hurt, betrayed, confused…you name it.. I thought to myself everyday how could I be so stupid, how did I let this happen, I cried, and cried, and cried asking my self how could anyone do this to anybody and think they could get away with this.. Telling my family and friends what happened and having to tell my mom was the hardest thing I have EVER had to do in my life.. I was so embarrassed but I knew that I needed help. So I reached out to her and told her everything. She consoled me, and told me not to worry , he won’t get away with this she said. She told me to contact the police department and go from there.. I talked to a couple different officers.. some told me because I physically handed him my money there was nothing I could do about it. Some told me that if I had proof.. I could take him to small claims court.. which I did.. I had plenty of text messages where we talked about the money.. plenty of text messages where it showed that we actually had a relationship and I wasn’t lying about any of it.. so I took him to court and I won!
Some advise I would give to someone going thru a similar situation is to always ask questions and actually be ok with it, and understand their response.. I would tell the next person to pay attention to all of the signs.. a women’s intuition is very real..secrecy in relationships is often a tall, tale sign that something’s not right.. it’s ok to get advise from the next person to hear what they have to say.. it doesn’t mean you have to take it but it’s always good to hear an opinion or two, learn and practice discernment. Being in that situation made me a stronger person, it made me realize that I can get through any storm. It made me appreciate my family and friends with how supportive they were. It made me take a step back to look at my life and start living it in a more positive way. Everything happens for a reason.. that was just my lesson to teach me that I needed to get my life together for me and only me.
Something I would tell the person dating this person is to always ask questions and be careful, use your best judgment, and if it doesn’t feel right don’t do it! Something I would tell my ex is I forgive you! And everything happens for a reason.